gravity will burn you, trust me...
the weight of time, the weight of your flesh, the weight of your deeds... they will all bear their brunt upon you at some point during your stay upon this plane of existence. whether beings in other dimensions also suffer from our sorts of gravity or not, i do not know. i think we are given reason to believe in a mythology that angelic beings suffer from longing in eternity and that's a type of time where there was no beginning nor will be any end. did god just create angels out of the blue, in their full blown form? how cruel was that? that they could not experience birth and growth and aging and death like those that they watch on earth do. no wonder they are jealous of our existences and look longingly over us in our resting places when we are buried in the ground. really, that's the only place we see embodiments of angels. the only other place is pretty much in religious paintings, and statues in museums. which are somewhat wastes. i mean, i get the religious iconography. that's meaningful. the stories that are told of Joan of Arc and St. George battling the dragon are inspirational because of how angels interceded in human affairs... am i right? i'm not even sure. Joan spoke to angels, didn't she?
God and now i'm so far off track from anything at all that i wanted to talk about. i wanted to talk about gravity and how it will wear you down. fall off a skateboard while riding down a steep asphalt road at a high speed and gravity will grind your skin into a pulpy, bloody mush. fast kill. live your life hard and fast by partying to much with drugs and a wild sex life and chances are that gravity will burn out your body. that's a bit slower than a high speed gravity crash from a fast moving vehicle, but the end result is the same. then there are the other, slower gravity burns... you can do a slow burn of poisoning your flesh by the foods you eat over the period of your lifetime and that can sometimes take decades to grind you down to a halt. is it all connected to some sort of negative idea or attitude inside our mentalities? do we all have an inherent death wish that is just a part of the mechanism of being a fleshy human that makes us hardwired for a gravity burnout? you never hear of anyone getting younger in their flesh and spirit as their life goes on. you do get older from the moment you are born. it's true, there are people that have some sorts of rejuvenating attitudes in their spirits and never seem to get worn out too much by the wears and tears of life. eternal optimists. but really, i bet that even their hearts have tread marks of sadness worn into them. no one can escape all sadness. its just part of this world that we are part of. plain and simple.
the trick is to find ways to stave off the gravity that attacks you most fiercely. that's why people go on diets. to fight the gravity of obesity that weighs down their bodies. or why people do any number of sorts of things that counter balance the things that seem to attack their joy principles. i had a realization a few months ago that the reason that people, young people and people crossing over from being young into being old in particular, exercise at gymnasiums - calisthenics and aerobics and all these muscle building exercises that are way beyond what is necessary to keep the body fit and strong, is because they want to be strong for, and better at sex. they want their bodies to be sexually attractive and they want to be able to perform good at sex. maybe i'm wrong. i don't do sex so doing all that exercise is of no consequence to me.
breaK: i just wanted to say that i'm tired. the first part of this year was gangbusters. each month mounted in intensity over the month before and i thought it was going to go on like this the whole, entire year. thank god it didn't. i think i would have died. literally. what i've done now with the isolation just feels natural and i'm not sad about it. i may be spouting lofty ideas, but i always do that anyway. i just need a break and i want to do something different. i did not anticipate such a major break coming though, and that i would come up with such major ideas for new changes... this is good. this means that the under current of the flow of this whole year is still strong within me. i am not depressed. no, by no means. in a normal year i'd hit a wall of depression after a physical wall of exhaustion collapsed upon me. ain't the case this time, sorry world. no, i'm still full of vim and scheme. something is brewing and it's gonna kick your ass. i just ain't gonna tell you about it. well, not much of it.
gravity is affecting me though and i need to find ways to counter it. one way that's good for me is to watch movies. i saw two good movies in the last 1 hours. 2 movies i have never even seen before. which sort of surprised me that i stuck with them (not that they were not good enough to stick with, but just that i could normally have easily been distracted by other things to do - i think since i am so exhausted by gravity right now it just felt good to lay in bed and watch the movies. have not been this tired in a long time).
one of the films was by Ingmar Bergman called The Passion of Anna. and the other was a film by Wim Wenders called Land of Plenty. if i had not written so much shit brain rambling above i'd have more energy left to talk about these films. maybe i'll come back later to comment more about them. they did not break my heart open, but they kept my attention rapt. both are full of poignant characters, vibrant cinematography, brilliant story telling... by two time honored directors. i recommend viewing them both. especially LoP, this weekend in particular because it deals with the 9/11 terror attacks, retrospectively.
God and now i'm so far off track from anything at all that i wanted to talk about. i wanted to talk about gravity and how it will wear you down. fall off a skateboard while riding down a steep asphalt road at a high speed and gravity will grind your skin into a pulpy, bloody mush. fast kill. live your life hard and fast by partying to much with drugs and a wild sex life and chances are that gravity will burn out your body. that's a bit slower than a high speed gravity crash from a fast moving vehicle, but the end result is the same. then there are the other, slower gravity burns... you can do a slow burn of poisoning your flesh by the foods you eat over the period of your lifetime and that can sometimes take decades to grind you down to a halt. is it all connected to some sort of negative idea or attitude inside our mentalities? do we all have an inherent death wish that is just a part of the mechanism of being a fleshy human that makes us hardwired for a gravity burnout? you never hear of anyone getting younger in their flesh and spirit as their life goes on. you do get older from the moment you are born. it's true, there are people that have some sorts of rejuvenating attitudes in their spirits and never seem to get worn out too much by the wears and tears of life. eternal optimists. but really, i bet that even their hearts have tread marks of sadness worn into them. no one can escape all sadness. its just part of this world that we are part of. plain and simple.
the trick is to find ways to stave off the gravity that attacks you most fiercely. that's why people go on diets. to fight the gravity of obesity that weighs down their bodies. or why people do any number of sorts of things that counter balance the things that seem to attack their joy principles. i had a realization a few months ago that the reason that people, young people and people crossing over from being young into being old in particular, exercise at gymnasiums - calisthenics and aerobics and all these muscle building exercises that are way beyond what is necessary to keep the body fit and strong, is because they want to be strong for, and better at sex. they want their bodies to be sexually attractive and they want to be able to perform good at sex. maybe i'm wrong. i don't do sex so doing all that exercise is of no consequence to me.
breaK: i just wanted to say that i'm tired. the first part of this year was gangbusters. each month mounted in intensity over the month before and i thought it was going to go on like this the whole, entire year. thank god it didn't. i think i would have died. literally. what i've done now with the isolation just feels natural and i'm not sad about it. i may be spouting lofty ideas, but i always do that anyway. i just need a break and i want to do something different. i did not anticipate such a major break coming though, and that i would come up with such major ideas for new changes... this is good. this means that the under current of the flow of this whole year is still strong within me. i am not depressed. no, by no means. in a normal year i'd hit a wall of depression after a physical wall of exhaustion collapsed upon me. ain't the case this time, sorry world. no, i'm still full of vim and scheme. something is brewing and it's gonna kick your ass. i just ain't gonna tell you about it. well, not much of it.
gravity is affecting me though and i need to find ways to counter it. one way that's good for me is to watch movies. i saw two good movies in the last 1 hours. 2 movies i have never even seen before. which sort of surprised me that i stuck with them (not that they were not good enough to stick with, but just that i could normally have easily been distracted by other things to do - i think since i am so exhausted by gravity right now it just felt good to lay in bed and watch the movies. have not been this tired in a long time).
one of the films was by Ingmar Bergman called The Passion of Anna. and the other was a film by Wim Wenders called Land of Plenty. if i had not written so much shit brain rambling above i'd have more energy left to talk about these films. maybe i'll come back later to comment more about them. they did not break my heart open, but they kept my attention rapt. both are full of poignant characters, vibrant cinematography, brilliant story telling... by two time honored directors. i recommend viewing them both. especially LoP, this weekend in particular because it deals with the 9/11 terror attacks, retrospectively.
Comments