THIS Rhett Butler Will Never Die

 So today I applied for ANOTHER job online... to work at Trader Joe's. Still have not heard anything from WF, and TJ says it may take 3 weeks before I'll hear from them. Thursday afternoon is my phone interview with the security company... Interestingly, I had a question-asking session with my pendulum just a few minutes ago... asked if I'll be offered a job at WF, or TJ, and the pendulum swung indifferently (which means that as of now, the answer is unknown). I then asked if I should keep playing the lotto game I've been obsessed with lately, and the pendulum immediately swung NO. The lottery is such a deep font of addictive, enjoyable fantasy thinking... the pleasure one gets from simply being able to imagine what one would do with such riches is practically orgasmic. It's a cheap thrill to toss a dollar into the "pool" and be allowed to "dream big"... Is it a waste of time doing this? Perhaps it genuinely is. I know I'm one day closer to t...

the telling of this story is for a young friend of mine. rather than cram it into her Facebook wall, i thought it might be better to offer it up here where there is a little more room for expansion and who knows, others might find it of interest. i was a strange person in high school. i had two personas; star athlete and campus jesus freak. i also did not do well in my studies, never had a girl friend, and laid the foundations for being the loner that i am today. when i say "campus jesus freak" i mean that if you were to ask anyone that went to my high school during the years that i was there, i would be the person that people would remember the most as being a freak about jesus. i started a movement there within a month of becoming a student at Monte Vista High School in Danville, California. today i have regrets about how the fervor i experienced and spread infected the thinking and behavior of those i then tried to lead to believe what i believed. how many lost souls there...