returning energies to sender

 For how powerful my meditation experiences have been as of late, one would think that I'd want to do nothing other than spend my entire day meditating because the experiences I've been having are so strong. I keep telling Scarlett about this over, and over that things are happening inside my meditations that I've never experienced before and that my own mind is blown by the surprises I feel happening and being revealed to me. Yet here I sit now in front of this machine, jotting down notes that can in no way translate what it is I just felt while meditating just a few short moments ago. I sat in my meditation chair, not having any pre-formed intent about what I wanted to explore or deliver. No one has asked for healings as of late, but there are two elderly men that I know of that need healings, so I did, at the end of this experience deliver some of the energy that I acquired to them. But those "healings" were not even close to the work I do when I have the intent to heal... anyway, here's what happened. I was having some lingering thoughts about the experience earlier today regarding the lotto game that I was experimenting with. Btw, numbers close in configuration to the winning numbers did match up in that experiment.. OK, I'm not focusing enough on explaining what I did there, don't feel like it's the main thing to share right now, maybe later I'll divulge that story. HERE'S what I did in this meditation just now, and again, it was not pre-planned. I just sat down into my trance state and this is what unfolded. You know those auto-recoil power cords that vacuum cleaners have? There's a push lever that you step on with your big toe and the mechanism inside the machine spins and pulls the extended cord back up into itself? Well, that's what happened. I didn't initiate it, it just happened. All of the energy of my mind, heart, soul, and body that I have attached to things outside of myself, all that energy started to pull back in and return to myself. Some of the instances of where my attentions have been attached to outside entities popped into my mind, but it was not necessary for me to recognize or identify all of the places that my energy had gone out to. It ALL came back in to me. When I finished the meditation I felt "full and complete" and my energy was empowered. I have done this type of exercise intentionally before but this time it was automatic, and now I recognize this as a new meditation tool that I'll be able to utilize regularly.

Before I went into meditation, now I remember, there was an intent that I felt calling me to service. I was feeling disturbed by the rampant "gun massacres" that happened in the state of California today and I felt God nudging me to help channel in and anchor more of THE LIGHT of GOD to help everyone become calm and stop losing their minds. Yeah, that's what I even decided to sit down and meditate for. I know I did this subconsciously, innocuously but I think more has to be done, so yeah, I got my won self care taken care of first, getting my energy back, but I'm going to go back in and meditate again to anchor more light and radiate out love and healing to the community en masse. It's getting a little bit terrifying to think that you never know where its safe to go out there in the world anymore when so many troubled souls just can't hold themselves together, and heal themselves anymore. We are all subject to being victim of these desperate souls that are going on these murderous rampages.

I remember the other thing that helped me have this experience of pulling my energy back in just now. This morning one of the astrology horoscope apps on my phone sent me a message that said something like, "You are no longer allowed to give/send love to those that do not love you in return." It was a bit silly sounding, and ironic because I have been having this philosophical debate with myself about people from my past that I still have lingering affections for, but that do not return any of that energy of kind friendship back to me. That, was what I feel like the whole point of this experience of feeling my energies return to me was about. Started the day receiving a message about my goal for the day and then the mission was accomplished by the end of the day. Well played, DarraighDee!!