twin flame, but yeah, so what?

 Somewhere in buried pages of this blog are some entries where I talk about the depth of experiences I have had in developing my friendship with Scarlett. She is the "twin-flame" that I alluded to in my last entry. (Well, i just searched thru the blog to see if I could pull up an entry where I spoke about the soul-mate understandings I have about Scarlett, but couldn't find "it"... I thought there was an entry where I talked about how Rhett Butler awoke the deepest feelings of kinship with her, where I felt so completely united with her... I may look further...)

The title of this blog, THIS RHETT BUTLER WILL NEVER DIE, is the basis of these deep feelings of soul union that I have with her. While reading Gone With The Wind, which is her favorite book, a book which I never would have picked up on my own... I was amazed by the character of Rhett Butler, and how his devotion to Scarlett O'Hara was a flawless reflection of how perfectly my soul fit into the puzzle of "My Scarlett's" life... 

I don't think about the twin-flame construct of our friendship anymore. I've expereinced it, full on, and the desire to find my missing half, well, it's over. She's it. Everything works perfectly between us. Nuff'said. There were phases in the past though where my infatuaion with her was so strong, I know that I wrote great treatises about how incredible the experiences of knowing her felt to experience. I'm grateful for the insights that Jason Estes has shared about twin-flames, that it's possible to have more than one type of this relationship in your life. That twin-flames do not have to be romantic relathioships. The depth of trust built from honesty in communications... 

I remember times when I completely dedicated my life to Scarlett, where I swore to her that nothing else mattered more than her safety and happiness to me. There were times when I had imaginings of us being able to live our lives together, or at least in close enough proximity to one another that would enable us to spend the hours of our days doing "our work" together... Those imaginings used to be very passionate. I felt like my ultimate happienss depended on our being able to spend our days together because when we were in close union, we did our strongest works together. That expeirence has transformed over the years... now, realizing that we will most likely never dwell in the same abode together, we tap into each other's encouraging energies invisibly, distantly, as muses do, and it works magically.

Inspirations about new projects are not as potent as they have been in the past, but I think that is reflective of the way the energies of the world are affecting everyone right now. We used to be consumed with performing "our arts" as the most powerful tool we possesed to achieve happiness in the world, but now that focus has shifted to the work we do as Reiki healers and prayer warriors.

If anything truly transformative has happened, this union with her, it's helped me understand and manifest within myself the power to be uniquely happy in and of myself. It used to feel like I was dependent on the union of our physical lives together... but now, living seperately as much as we do, our soul union occurs in the ethers... I am happy just knowing that she is there, and that she exists... but I go on living my days on my own... and the other thing that has happened is I no longer feel a longing to even have another physical being in my life. I'm more content being alone than I ever imagined possible.

I still don't know if I've said everything here that I think is necesarry to express about this right now... It feels like the fire of my conviction is somewhat lacking... I guess I'll let it just go as is for now... 

(grammarly did not turn on for editing while writing this, so forgive my typos, thanks!)