opeth maiden, where art thou...

i fell in love with the music of opeth during the winter of 2007. it was near the time when i first discovered the soothing balm of death metal music... they are playing in San Francisco on Tuesday night and i feel like i should be there. i'm on the verge of buying a ticket to go by myself. i just would rather have someone to go with. my first choice of who i'd like to go with is my oldest known Opeth fan friend, Rachel. i still have a crush on her and i think she suspects this. she said no when i asked her to go with me. i wrote a note just a few minutes ago to see if young Kaiti, the fiery Norse-goddess from Oakland wants to go. waiting to hear back from her. if she says yes, i will definitely go. tempted to ask Daisy, sort of as a last resort but she seems so spacey to me sometimes when i've been out with her before i'm not sure what it would be like to be with her, even though any time i've been out with her before i've enjoyed myself. and here is the sad fact. if i were to call and ask Jahan to go, i know she'd say yes. because of her Joe-drama, i don't want to be close to her. the more i hear their music these past couple of days, the more i really want to be there. i think i may have to just go alone. man up, wear the black, get grounded and feel the earth rumble.

it's been so long since i've been to a concert, and there is also Adrian Belew this very same night. that is where i'd be expected to be by my closest peers, but my heart cries for opeth. other things this week, i'm in connection with these flakey models that i feel no sense of commitment from that will not make solid plans for a shoot and i can't stand the way it feels like a waste of my mind's time and energy. i got a phone call from a woman who i've wanted to shoot for a long time (over a year now - i gave her my card that long ago), and she is ready to shoot in two days time. THAT is the kind of thrilling desire in a model that i need.

stay tuned to hear in a few days what has developed...