THIS Rhett Butler Will Never Die

Ok, it is March 6th, 2008 and I am ready to sit down and get serious about the writing of my novel once again. I feel a new inspiration to delve deeply into the work but in looking over my hand written notes and my attempts at typed chapters I feel a sense of confusion. There are so many ideas of who I want to be in the story and what I want to have happen between them. I feel good about one thing; I know the progression of the story up until how it ends. The way it feels now there are several ways that it could end and I don't think I'll decide until I get to the point in my writing where I am nearer to the end and have to make final decisions. And I am fine with that. Tonight I am going to print off what I am calling my beginning chapters and pore over them to see what works and what doesn't work and maybe I'll rewrite those "chapters" so that they are cohesive and flow, unifying their voice and connectivity. In fact, that is a very good idea. Because now wi...

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Mobile post sent by daryldarko using Utterz .    Replies .   mp3

Mobile post sent by daryldarko using Utterz .    Replies .   mp3

well, i took the seroquel-brain damage again last night. i decided that the increased amount of mental focus it is giving me is worth the potential brain damage. for right now at least. my dreams usually seem to take on an epic time frame when i write them out. i am a bit of a freak about including innocuous details. bear with me. Road Trip ah, this dream started out with me arriving somewhere where i was to pick up two younger male characters who i was to go on a road trip with. they seemed to be in their teens, when i first met them. i had driven down a long narrow road along flats near the ocean, or so it seems now in recollection. not a straight road. i remember there being a a sandy parking area with those greasy telephone poles laying on the ground creating a border of where you are not supposed to drive beyond. there was a small shack that the boys must have lived in off to the side. i saw one of the boys standing outside the shack and walked up and followed him inside. there we...

at a cross roads now with this decision i need to make about the seroquel. if you read (or saw) the article i posted earlier about antipsychotic medications causing brain damage, you can fully appreciate my decision to not want to use seroquel anymore. you may also appreciate my standing that it is something i never wanted to go back on in the first place. i NEVER liked that drug. in just three days of taking it i have felt a slight recession back into a quiet, dark and hidden place inside my psyche. i'm feeling a little less gregarious than i have been of late, but i'd even say it borders a little on feeling on the fringe of depressed; body has less energy, spirit is looking inward rather than outward. not feeling sad, just have less spark now. what has happened though is that i am sleeping longer than 4 hours at a time AND i am dreaming . you know, dear reader, how i love my dream time. i'm waking up from dreaming now and feeling an instant desire to sit down and write my...

my mom fell down the other day. she was alone at a pet sitting job of hers at a house that she loves to stay at in Walnut Creek. luckily, i was near by at home in San Ramon when she phoned me. i was there within 15 minutes. turns out that she was ok, no obviously broken bones but she tripped going down a 2" step and fell on her face. she must have bounced is all i can guess, or an angel of some sort cushioned her fall because the woman is not unfragile. funny how last week was so dead, work wise for me and how potentially busy this week may be. Julia wrote to me and said she wants to hang out. How cool is that? A woman just up and wrote to me suggesting we "hang out"? I cannot remember that ever happening before, not in such a casual statement as that. Although there was one girl when I was at UCSC that had said to me that we should get together sometime to watch horror films together and that we could "do anything" together. i never made time for her. damn. he...