my fifth, and last reading at Intuitive Way, for awhile at least...
I had a rather profound aura reading at Intuitive Way (IW) last night. I say it may be the last reading I'll have for awhile because I'm moving into a new phase of the training where "energy readings" will be offered instead of "free readings" like I received in the first 4 months of my training. I think I'm going to miss these readings because they are so personally enlightening. They have become clearer and more pertinent as I've advanced in the training, but now, in the next phases of my training, I'm going to learn the skills of giving readings. So perhaps I'll also become able to read myself.
The Reading:
I haven't received my audio recording of the reading yet so I'm writing these notes from memory. A lot of shadowy energy from my ancestors appeared last night. In the first layer of my aura a bold shadow energy from my father's mother appeared (Doris Driscoll) and she was very frustrated with me over the matter of me not getting things done in my life. I asked if it was a newly appeared concern of hers and they said, "No, she's been upset like this for 47 years." Well, just now doing a calculation in my mind, 47 years ago is the exact time when my father died. It makes me think that all these years I've missed the point of what the purpose of my father leaving this world at that time was. That it was a gift for me (us), but that I reacted in the wrong way and went into darkness, sadness, and confusion as a result, rather than becoming enlightened and empowered. So they healed "her" - I think that her holding onto that energy is what ended up locking me into keeping that awareness and attitude for so long. That's what makes sense to me at least.
In the third layer of my aura, my father appeared with a similar shadowy type of presence. His energy was angry. Again, it makes me think that he too thought that his death was misunderstood and that I've been reacting and living in a state of confusion and disempowerment, missing the real gift that his leaving this earth so early in my childhood offered me. This was a weird bit of information for me to receive, partly because about a year ago I finally became clear enough mentally and spiritually to be able to locate the energy of my father's spirit in the astral plane. And when I found him, it felt to me like he was proud of me for becoming who I had become, despite the odds of being able to survive as long as I have. Maybe he showed me this kindness out of concern for me to not be afraid of him. Understanding multidimensional reality I see that it's possible for him to be in both states of awareness. And perhaps, this shadowy energy of his that we found last night is an old perspective of his that he's been stuck in since I was that age when he left. Anyway, they healed him too so that I can be free of being held back any longer.
More ancestral shadow-energy appeared in my 5th aura level. Ranks of my ancestors appeared that were connected to me who were all upset that I was not experiencing life like they did. That they were upset because I had different perspectives, different opportunities than they had, and that I was not making better discoveries and progress from being free of the restrictions they all experienced. I forgot to ask for healing for them because there were other issues that arose that seemed to need more attention. Perhaps they'll begin to fall into place behind my father and grandmother having been healed. Oh, it was interesting too because they said these ancestors looked like "zombies", haha. Poor souls, I want to please you all, but moreso I want to heal you all.
Okay, in my fourth aura level some beings were discovered that usurped energy from me that I create through dreaming about having intimate relationships in my life. In my not having intimate relationships, I create experiences of such by "dreaming about having intimacy", and these beings feed off of the energy I create doing that. In my attachment to their company, I have forgone believing that I'll ever be able to have the real thing. So I asked them to heal those beings and send them away. We'll have to wait and see what develops next. I gave up about 6 months ago about hoping that I'll ever experience intimacy, and have felt at peace with that decision. It'll take something phenomenal happening to take me out of this being alone life I've resigned to enduring.
There was another vision one of the readers had of seeing me being a 7 year old boy full of wonder floating in a bubble above the Grand Canyon, looking on at the world curiously but being unable to connect with the real place, that I dreamed about the things I could do in this world, but that I could not make contact with the energies of the world and make them happen.
Okay, that's about all that I can remember from not hearing the recording. When I get it later maybe I'll come back and write some more.
The Reading:
I haven't received my audio recording of the reading yet so I'm writing these notes from memory. A lot of shadowy energy from my ancestors appeared last night. In the first layer of my aura a bold shadow energy from my father's mother appeared (Doris Driscoll) and she was very frustrated with me over the matter of me not getting things done in my life. I asked if it was a newly appeared concern of hers and they said, "No, she's been upset like this for 47 years." Well, just now doing a calculation in my mind, 47 years ago is the exact time when my father died. It makes me think that all these years I've missed the point of what the purpose of my father leaving this world at that time was. That it was a gift for me (us), but that I reacted in the wrong way and went into darkness, sadness, and confusion as a result, rather than becoming enlightened and empowered. So they healed "her" - I think that her holding onto that energy is what ended up locking me into keeping that awareness and attitude for so long. That's what makes sense to me at least.
In the third layer of my aura, my father appeared with a similar shadowy type of presence. His energy was angry. Again, it makes me think that he too thought that his death was misunderstood and that I've been reacting and living in a state of confusion and disempowerment, missing the real gift that his leaving this earth so early in my childhood offered me. This was a weird bit of information for me to receive, partly because about a year ago I finally became clear enough mentally and spiritually to be able to locate the energy of my father's spirit in the astral plane. And when I found him, it felt to me like he was proud of me for becoming who I had become, despite the odds of being able to survive as long as I have. Maybe he showed me this kindness out of concern for me to not be afraid of him. Understanding multidimensional reality I see that it's possible for him to be in both states of awareness. And perhaps, this shadowy energy of his that we found last night is an old perspective of his that he's been stuck in since I was that age when he left. Anyway, they healed him too so that I can be free of being held back any longer.
More ancestral shadow-energy appeared in my 5th aura level. Ranks of my ancestors appeared that were connected to me who were all upset that I was not experiencing life like they did. That they were upset because I had different perspectives, different opportunities than they had, and that I was not making better discoveries and progress from being free of the restrictions they all experienced. I forgot to ask for healing for them because there were other issues that arose that seemed to need more attention. Perhaps they'll begin to fall into place behind my father and grandmother having been healed. Oh, it was interesting too because they said these ancestors looked like "zombies", haha. Poor souls, I want to please you all, but moreso I want to heal you all.
Okay, in my fourth aura level some beings were discovered that usurped energy from me that I create through dreaming about having intimate relationships in my life. In my not having intimate relationships, I create experiences of such by "dreaming about having intimacy", and these beings feed off of the energy I create doing that. In my attachment to their company, I have forgone believing that I'll ever be able to have the real thing. So I asked them to heal those beings and send them away. We'll have to wait and see what develops next. I gave up about 6 months ago about hoping that I'll ever experience intimacy, and have felt at peace with that decision. It'll take something phenomenal happening to take me out of this being alone life I've resigned to enduring.
There was another vision one of the readers had of seeing me being a 7 year old boy full of wonder floating in a bubble above the Grand Canyon, looking on at the world curiously but being unable to connect with the real place, that I dreamed about the things I could do in this world, but that I could not make contact with the energies of the world and make them happen.
Okay, that's about all that I can remember from not hearing the recording. When I get it later maybe I'll come back and write some more.
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