a strange change...
a few days ago one of my parakeets (Draven) started to show signs of ill health and i became worried that she would quickly fall over dead, just like Merricat did several months ago. i was upset by the idea of her suffering and followed an instinct that i developed awhile ago. i've thought many times of opening the window of their room and just letting them fly away. when i used to let the birds fly freely in their room they were so happy. but the mess got unmanageable and now we have a second cat in the house - a creature i don't really like, or trust.
so after watching Draven's condition worsen over about 3 days i took action. i caught her and opened the bathroom window and let her fly off. it was around 5pm and the sky was a lovely color and the air was warm. with the thick foliage outside though, i almost immediately lost sight of her. i went outside to see if i could see where she had gone. not that i had changed my mind and was going to catch her and bring her back in, but there was some sense of final attachment still holding me somewhat.
when i walked around the house i found her limp body on the ground, her neck broken. the new cat at our house, Sylvester, was standing near by with an awful look of guilt on it's face. now here is the strange change that i was talking about. when Merricat died i mourned her passing. i took photographs of her body and i wrapped her in decorative cloths. in fact, i still have her body in an air tight container in my room. yesterday though, i just grabbed a shovel and dug a quick hole and scooted Draven's body into it. no remorse, no ceremony... just a letting go and a moving on. i think i was actually more attached to Merricat than i was to Draven, Merricat was such a pretty and delicate little soul.
oh well, eh? oh, and today i went straight to the pet store and bought a brand new yellow parakeet. i don't want the remaining two parakeets; Rudra and Canguru to suffer loneliness, or think that i'll do the same thing to them...
so after watching Draven's condition worsen over about 3 days i took action. i caught her and opened the bathroom window and let her fly off. it was around 5pm and the sky was a lovely color and the air was warm. with the thick foliage outside though, i almost immediately lost sight of her. i went outside to see if i could see where she had gone. not that i had changed my mind and was going to catch her and bring her back in, but there was some sense of final attachment still holding me somewhat.
when i walked around the house i found her limp body on the ground, her neck broken. the new cat at our house, Sylvester, was standing near by with an awful look of guilt on it's face. now here is the strange change that i was talking about. when Merricat died i mourned her passing. i took photographs of her body and i wrapped her in decorative cloths. in fact, i still have her body in an air tight container in my room. yesterday though, i just grabbed a shovel and dug a quick hole and scooted Draven's body into it. no remorse, no ceremony... just a letting go and a moving on. i think i was actually more attached to Merricat than i was to Draven, Merricat was such a pretty and delicate little soul.
oh well, eh? oh, and today i went straight to the pet store and bought a brand new yellow parakeet. i don't want the remaining two parakeets; Rudra and Canguru to suffer loneliness, or think that i'll do the same thing to them...
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